Coming up this Fall on wineLIFE myLIFE

September 2012 - Wine School Review: The first in a two part "Back to School" Series for my fellow wine lovers, I will help you sift through the many wine classes and courses that have proliferated since the wine-eratti figured out that YOU LOVE GOOD JUICE!! Don't worry kiddies, mama will help you figure it out before the school bell rings!

October 2012 - Wine Book Review: In the second in my two part "Back to School" Series, I will help you sort through the stacks and find the books that will tell you what YOU WANT TO KNOW ABOUT WINE based on what your interest level is. Whether you're just a happy tippler or you are seriously considering a career change into my world, this piece will help you zero in on the right literature to accompany your next glass.

November 2012 - An Ode to Champagne: In honor of my #ChampagneSister nomination (thank you @ChampagneChat), I must write about the world's most fabulous drink! You will learn that it isn't just for toasts as we discover ways to enjoy it throughout the meal - now that's sparkling lifestyle!!

Plus sneak peak excerpts from my upcoming book The Life and Times of Love and Vines!
Follow @LyfTymzLuvVynz

Follow

I can't wait to get your feedback on these posts! Cheers :)

xoxoxo


Rashida Veronique DWS

Why Not Certify - Organic Reasoning in Wine

On a recent Monday evening at the New York Open Center, members and guests opened their minds and palates to a world of alternative viticulture in a talk and tasting of organic, biodynamic and sustainably produced wines. Conspicuously, the organic wine chosen for the evening was not certified so. There was no indication whatsoever of the fact that they do indeed employ organic farming methods on a vineyard that has been farmed with the same care for more than 30 years in upstate New York's Finger Lakes AVA, one of the only such vineyards in the district.

I felt it wholly important and interesting to talk about why organic wines in particular are often not so labeled or certified.

Here are some reasons:

1. Unfavorable Climates - In the Champagne region of France, for example, the climate is northern continental, with very cold winters and cool summers. This has historically been a marginal wine growing region and ripening is uneven over the years, hence the prevalence of non-vintage champagne. It's the one French region that markets their wines by brand more than by vintage or terroir, creating a consistent proprietary style by blending wine kept in inventory over a series of vintages. There are only 4 or so years every decade in which a champagne house will make a vintage champagne, that's how many times every ten years the weather is kind enough to give the champenois one awesome harvest. The initial changeover from conventional farming to organics makes an impact on yields, and the duration of that impact is difficult to determine beforehand - who knows what could happen?? While there are a few organic champagne vineyards, by and large, its a difficult feat and still remains a miniscule part of the overall market there. Perhaps global warming will usher in more possibilities...

Long Island is another great example. Here there are no known organic grape growers at all. The North Fork of Long Island and The Hamptons AVAs exist way out on the east end in the cradle of the Long Island Sound and Peconic Bay - a quintessential maritime climate. Humidity abounds and with it, rampant fungal diseases of every possible sort, so abandoning a spraying regime is a changeover that could easily spell disaster for a vineyard in any given vintage. Perhaps someone will have the courage one day, but for now, use of agrochemicals is common, if reluctantly so.

2. Unfavorable Markets - Once again in Champagne, another reason for the fear of lost yields through organic changeover. The champagne industry is made up of growers and producers who are essentially not all in the same business. The growers grow the vines and in general don't produce the wine from the grapes they grow. Instead, they sell their harvest to champagne houses, who then make wine. Growers profit more from quantity than quality. Remember the wine is just going to be blended anyway, so while quality is a consideration, wineries largely want to make sure they get a good price per kilogram.

3. Technicalities - It was a Saturday morning at the 82nd Street Farmers Market where I met Kelly Barrett, who's family owns Silver Thread Winery on Seneca Lake in the Finger Lakes district in central New York State. At the end of last August, Shannon Brock and her husband Paul took the leap and purchased the 35 year old winery and vineyard. Paul, who was previously head wine maker for Lamoreaux Landing Wine Cellars (also on Seneca Lake) and currently teaches winemaking at Finger Lakes Community College in Geneva, NY, worked with previous owner Richard Figiel during the six months prior to aid the transition. The previous owner was committed to sustainability and practiced organic viticulture since the inception of his vineyard. At one point, Silver Thread was indeed certified. Then came some new neighbors, who began farming using agrochemicals too nearby. According to New York State's certification guidlines, if farms in your area are spraying within a certain "drift area", you cannot remain certified. Silver Thread Winery lost its certification. Nonetheless, he continued his commitment to organic viticulture, and the new owners intend to carry the torch so they can preserve their beautiful land and vineyards for their two children, now ages 4 and 1, and their children after them.
(full article on Silver Thread Winery with tasting note to follow)

4. Principle - Much like Silver Thread, many vineyards in the world never adopted the use of agrochemicals into their work. In the old world, which essentially includes all of winegrowing Europe, you will find that there are vineyards that are centuries old and have always farmed this way, long before the existence of the modern day nomenclature "organic". For them, it wasn't a diversion from convention, it was convention; it was just the way things were done. For many of these viticulturalists, the idea of spending money and jumping through hoops to get certified for something they've always been doing is absurd!

Here's an analogy: What if bathing on a regular basis went out of style? Then a particular generation comes of age and decides that perhaps bathing was a good idea, because now we have a host of awful problems that resulted from the emergence of non-bathing. So they create an organization to promote regular bathing - you could even pay them money, follow their methods, and become "Certified Squeaky Clean" by their standards. If you were the person who never stopped bathing regularly in the first place, would you feel the need to become certified?

5. Cost - As with any kind of certification, cost is involved. Some certifying bodies are for profit, others are non profit, while still others are government based. Even the regulations vary from one organization to the next. The one thing they all have in common is that they charge a fee for you to place their seal on your packaging and let your customers know you are indeed organic. For some wineries and vineyards, most of which are small business, the cost of certification is prohibitive.






Having said all this, it's important to understand that none of these reasons changes the mindset - those that are practicing are committed, certified or not, and among those who are not pracitcing wholesale organics because of unfavorable conditions, there are those who are at least taking baby steps and making efforts to do the right thing in their own way. Officially, less than two percent of the world's vineyard was expected to be certified organic by 2007, but there is not (and can be no) official count of how many are practicing and are NOT certified. My best advice is to ask your trusted wine gurus in your favorite retail stores and restaurants to guide you. We know the stories behind the wines we chose to carry and will pass those on to you with great care so you can make informed decisions. We understand how important this is to you!

Meet Mencía - The Dutchess

aka Bierzo on a Saturday Night

Did I order it just because I like pronouncing it?? Bee-air-THO. When I say it the subtext is “Yes, I know of what I speak”. The Bierzo region is a small DO in north-west Spain’s Galicia neighborhood. This medium bodied red is made from the Mencía grape (another fun pronunciation – Men-THEE-ah, gotta love those Castillians!) which lives happily on slate and granite soils not far from the Atlantic coast.

On the palate, it plays out like a less demanding Pinot Noir, not quite the princess. It is similarly elegant with ripe berry fruit and well-balanced acidity and alcohol, although more straight forward and somewhat meatier – it had sort of a Damn Good Jerky undercurrent (like yes, its beef jerky, but it’s the best I’ve ever tasted, no lie!). The first one to cross my palate about six
years back was by José Palacios, a beautiful biodynamic Bierzo named Petalos. It left me feeling like I knew I wanted to experience a Bierzo again before I die. Although Mencía is no princess she has undeniable palate pedigree. She has well etched features, precision posture. Sadly, Bierzo is still scarce in this market. So when I saw it on the wine list at Riposo 46 in Hell’s Kitchen last Saturday Night, I had to jump back and kiss myself.

Pago de Valdetruchas Los Cerezales 2008 Bierzo (wine list price $50/bottle, retails for around $20) was a somewhat simpler version of the one that has haunted my palate dreams over the years. Her corset wasn’t wound as tight, but she was thoroughly satisfying nonetheless. Dora loved it with the Gorgonzola on our cheese plate, while I thought the unabashed saltiness of the Serrano Ham flatbread, which was heaped with generous servings of the ham, rocket lettuce and kalamata olives, made the fruit in the wine come alive and do back spins on my tongue. It was an all around success. My cousin Edrica, a budding wine aficionado in her own right, enjoyed the wine as well.

The great thing is that when you do find it, even the biodynamic Petalos, you will not pay much more than $20.00 a bottle to experience the magic. Wine-Searcher.com came up with lots of hits at around $18.00 for that wine, while it seems the only place to get Los Cerezales is at Wine Library in New Jersey for $19.98. Nonetheless, just for shits and giggles, pop into your local wine retailer and ask them for a good bee-air-THO and enjoy the reaction. With any luck they will indeed have one and be proud to be able to offer it to someone who is obviously in the know. Do let me know how this went!

Wine and West indian Wednesday

Last week, Lisa Donneson DWS, owner of North Fork of Long Island AVA brand Bouké Wines and I got together at her home in Brooklyn Heights to dish, cook and drink wine – it was hard work, really it was! The goal was to pair some dishes I grew up eating with some of her wines. My family on all sides –mother, biological father and stepfather – hails from the tiny and bucolic Commonwealth of Dominica in the eastern Caribbean (I’m first generation American). Growing up in south Brooklyn, my childhood memories recall sunny Saturday mornings with my parents eating Accra, also known as fishcake, saltfish fritters or to my latino peeps “bacalao-itos”, while listening to Carl Anthony spin reggae and soca tunes on 1190AM WLIB before starting the chores and cleaning. Then it was smoked herring with plain bagels – 6 for $1.00 back then purchased on Flatbush Avenue near the corner of Flatlands – after Sunday mass. It was family time over heritage food. No wine was involved back then. My stepfather, who is a chef by trade and an awesome cook (he currently operates his own bar and restaurant in Pointe Michel, Dominica called The Curve), taught me how to make all the dishes I grew up eating, and today I incorporate them into my wineLIFE with a lots of love.

Lisa and I chatted the previous week to decide the menu and she asked me for a shopping list. For a heartbeat, I was stumped. These are not “recipes” per se, so I gave her what I thought I’d love to have on hand in the house if I was in the mood for any of these dishes, more akin a wish list than an ingredient list. I let her know I would bring along some homemade pepper sauce to give everything its authentic spice kick, but the rest was up to whatever was available in Brooklyn Heights. As a result, the nature of the actual food items was left up to some interpretation. I’ve been buying saltfish and smoked herring for decades now, its almost a reflex.

She emailed me to say that her fishmonger instructed her to start soaking the salt cod immediately on Friday so that it could be cooked and eaten on Monday. When I arrived, I was delighted to find that instead of the dried tail cuts available in supermarkets (labeled bacalao, usually not even real cod), there was a lovely, fleshy belly cut soaking in a ceramic dish. I knew I’d stepped into something marvelous!

These dishes were to be paired with her off-dry rosé, under the Bouquet label in her line. The 2010 vintage we tasted is a blend of Cabernet Sauvignon and Merlot with a spot of Gewurztraminer for aroma (the brand signature). It’s just off dry, just enough to lift the fruit, and the finish is squeaky clean. We got to work on our little island feast.

We enjoyed the rosé best with the sautéed salt fish, which we cooked with onions, garlic and bell peppers and finished with cilantro and a squeeze of lime. The spicy, savory, salty dish awakened all the marvelous fruit notes in the wine and put the acidity to work cleaning and freshening up the palate for the next bite. Perfect pairing!

The fishcake was a natural with Bouké Perlant 2009, which is a slightly effervescent blend of three Pinots – Gris, Blanc and Noir. Sparkling wines and fried foods usually make happy couples.

The smoked herring, which I made with tomato paste and fresh Roma tomatoes, found a partner in Bouké Red, a wine that often goes well with tomato-based dishes. The Bouké Red is a wineLIFE fan favorite, a blend of Cabernet Sauvignon, Cabernet Franc, Syrah and Petit Verdot, and the 2008 vintage is still drinking beautifully!

Conclusions:
1. Wine and West Indian food can work well together – and we don’t all have to drink sweet to enjoy it!
2. The white wine with fish rule is officially broken!
3. When buying saltfish, spring for the belly cut of real cod– it makes for a much nicer finished product!

It was a big meal! I walked it off over the Brooklyn Bridge, past Liberty Plaza (Occupy! Salute!) and down to the Ferry to head home.

Visit Lisa’s blog for the full ingredient lists and methods of preparation:
http://boukewines.wordpress.com/2012/01/10/salt-cod-and-herring-west-indian-style/

Meet Zinfandel - The Soul Singer

It’s one o’clock in the morning. Pinot’s party is in full swing. Pinot Gris has switched the vibe with some mellow acoustic soul, and Merlot has had enough glasses of bubbly to feel encouraged to approach the object of his desire. He has been trying to find the right words to use to approach her. “Excuse me Miss Sultry, you’re aroma called me from across the room, I just HAD to get closer to you.” Or “Gorgeous Lady Zin, loving you could never be a sin.” There she is, holding her position by the baby grand, microphone in one hand, her other pretty bejeweled hand playing with the stem of a glass filled with something white, something chilled. She’s having a chat with Viognier and Syrah, he’s thinking about how to interrupt gracefully. The off-white silk dress clinging to her full bodied curves makes his heart race, and when she smiles, her pearly whites look as though their floating in the darkness like the grin of the Cheshire cat. “Brown sugar mama, blackberry baby love, I want you in my life.”

Although discovered to be the same as the Primitivo grape cultivated in Apulia, Italy (the heel of the boot), and a close relative of a grape from Croatia called Plavac Mali, Zinfandel is indisputably an American original. Up until 1998 it was the most planted grape in California. Many are familiar with the pink pop known as White Zinfandel, the rosé “blush” which is produced in copious amounts and invariably sells for less than $8 a bottle – bubblegum in a glass! The variety was taken for granted for the most part until the 1960’s, when a handful of winemakers, most notably Paul Draper of Ridge Vineyards on the Montebello Ridge in the Santa Cruz Mountains AVA, made the red version an icon by producing single vineyard Zinfandels and Zin-dominated blends. There is even a thriving trade organization to promote the variety called ZAP – Zinfandel Advocates and Producers. They sponsor research in Zinfandel Vines and host events for consumers and trade every year. Those who fall in love with Zin are captivated for all time!

Flavor Profile
Here’s an amazing tasting note from Certified Sommelier Countess Rose Perry (Follow her @VinoCaPisco on Twitter), self-proclaimed Zinfandel expert (her words), for Hunt Cellars Rocket Man Zinfandel:

Appearance – Deep Amethyst, almost opaque

Nose – Violets, twizzlers and brown sugar-coated tea rose

Palate – Fleshy, meaty, jammy & extremely Marilyn Monroe type full bodied, flavors of blackberry jam, white pepper crusted ripened strawberries, clove, spiced grape jelly

Conclusions – LOVE IT!

This should give you an idea of what a typical Zinfandel can bring into your life – the goody goody goods, all day. Definitely for an American palate, kids who grew up on these flavors can skip the pink stuff and go straight for the red!

Food Pairings
In truth, Zinfandel is divine as a solo act (a few back up singers can enhance the blend, but she doesn’t need accompaniment beyond that). Nonetheless, I pressed our Countess Rose, who agrees about drinking her Zin unadulterated, but suggested a Jarlsberg grilled cheese on brioche or green Cerignola olives with old vine versions.

Your Homework
Attack 2 Zins this weekend, one on the high end of the market if you can, and one for under $20. Top Zinfandels are worth the bucks, but you will have to shell out upwards of $60 a bottle for Ridge, Turley, Rosenblum, A. Rafanelli and the like, that Hunt Cellars Rocket Man included. These wineries are Zin temples, where homage is paid in the form of hand selection of grapes from old vines and painstaking blending and aging. There is, nonetheless, enough good juice (even from some old vines) on the lower end to go around, since it is such a ubiquitous and highly productive vine. One of my faves is Gnarly Head Old Vines Zinfandel, which retails for less than $13 a bottle and is delicious for the price. You’ll find Zinfandel based blends containing Petite Sirah, Grenache, Carignan, and other Syrah-compatible varieties. It turns out Merlot doesn’t end up in her mix – she’s too much woman for him!

*Old Zinfandel Vine planted in 1925 Courtesy of my Facebook Friend, Wine Trick

Tasting Note: Marqués de Tomares Rioja Gran Reserva 2001

Before I layed me down to sleep
I prayed my decanter my wine to keep
If it had died before I woke
I wouldn't have found it a funny joke!

Today, New Year's Eve 2011, I tasted at 12:30PM in a gorgeous Bottega del Vino glass from Verona, Marqués de Tomares 2001 Rioja Gran Reserva. It was in great shape *phew!*, and I wrote a tasting note following the Wine and Spirit Education Trust guidlines I was indoctrinated with while practicing for my 4 tries before passing the Unit 3 tasting exam (just one less try than the number of road tests for my NYS Driver's License)

Marqués de Tomares Rioja 2001 Gran Reserva is a limited production run of 10,423 numbered 750ml bottles (today I opened bottle number 1158) and 960 Magnums. It's 90% Temrpanillo and 10% Mazuelo, a less heralded but very important grape variety that is one of four red varieties legally allowed in Rioja wines. It's known as Carignan in France, and job is to contribute a little seasoning to a blend.

Gran Reserva is a term regulated by the Consejo Regulador, and can be applied to wines made in only in very execptional vintages from the top vineyards of the region. White Gran Reservas exist, but they are even more rare than red ones. The law requires they are aged for a minumum of two years in oak barrels and they are not allowed to leave the winery until six years after vintage, although in practice they are usually treated to much more aging - this particular Gran Reserva had nine cellared years at Marqués de Tomares winery before it arrived on US shores. It rested thirty months of that time in American Oak barrels (customarily the oak of choice in the region) and spent the rest of the time louging in bottles in the cellar. The 750 ml bottles arrived in handsome wooden cases (six to a box), while the magnums were packed in individual branded wooden coffins. Wine swag!

I first tasted this wine in the summer of 2010 while considering it for purchase for the shelves at my shop, the erstwhile wineLIFE Wine Shop in New York. I retasted it in November of that year and wrote a very simple tasting note:
Appearance - Garnet (in WSET terms, garnet is more of a reddish brown, normal for old world wines and wines from older vintages, while ruby would define a red leaning toward purple or blue, normal for young wines)
Nose - Earthy, Green Pepper, Black Olive
Palate - Complex, layers of cinnamon, coffee, spice, green tea... and I wrote acidity, which in wineLIFE speak indicates that the wine's acidity was surprisingly fresh for its age (this was a tasting note jotted quickly while standing in front of the wine's importer, James Turney of Parador Selections, in my store)
I gave the wine five stars. It was a freshly opened sample, not decanted.

The next time I drank it, we were having ribs, baked macaroni and cheese and other wonderful comfort foods on July 5, 2011 for the birthday of my long time friend Wil Otero - we drank magnum number 342. It was an epic summer celebration!

So last night around 11:00PM, I gently poured the wine into a Riedel Merlot 750ml decanter* (see end note). While doing so, I remembered an interesting piece of wine history, very old, simple technology that I could see last night still works. The bottle this wine was packaged in is the traditional Bordeaux shape, that is straight sides with shoulders. The original purpose for the design of that bottle was so that while you pour, the shoulders would catch any sediment so you wouldn't have to chew on polymerized tannins in your glass while drinking. I could see this happening as I poured - the shoulders were indeed holding back the sediment!

I let the decanted wine stand in my kitchen overnight, in a shady, relatively cool corner. For lunch I had it with a grilled cheese sandwich and took a thorough tasting note a little over 12 hours after decanting. As I write this post at 4:00PM I'm still sipping it and it is still giving up lots of delish goods. Now, withouth further ado, today's tasting note on this wine:

Appearance - Deep garnet, mahogany core fading to a brownish rim

Nose - Clean, deep and intense with a bouquet of leather, sage, dried raspberry, cherry and fig, caramel, cedar/ciagr box, cured black olives

Palate - Long length with beautifully balanced alcohol and acidity, silky fine graned tannins. It reminded me of a charred sirloin steak off the grill, cooked medium rare, or jerk seasoning minus the peppery kick, and that cedar/cigar box aroma played in my retronasal passage (accessed from inside the mouth while tasting). Hints of herbal flavors of rosemary, bayleaf and green olive laced the profile and there was an underlying flavor of black trumpet mushrooms (trompettes de la mort)

The wine still gets five stars - it is in amazing condition and decanting showed me the mature side of The Dreamgirl, with all her contures. Complex, this wine is a picture of power and soul. She could hold off the Klan with a shotgun to protect her children one day and cry while watching a love story the next.

A rare and wonderful experience to end this rare and wonderful year and usher in the promise of 2012. Cheers, Happy New Year, thanks for reading. Please share, tweet, post and comment to your heart's content!

*Riedel Merlot Decanter is a model name. While its probably true that Riedel made this specific decanter with Merlot's best interests at heart (they are known for specialist varietal glassware) it still worked just fine for the Gran Reserva. In fact, I have other decanters that are wider and would have spread the wine out more, but I chose this one because while I wanted to aerate the Rioja, I didn't want to assault it with too much oxygen. This decanter kept the wine in close quarters. By the 24 hour mark, it was starting to fall to pieces.

Vino Bash at Pinot's

It’s the second-to-last Friday in December. The halls are decked, the candles are lit, and Riesling, The Cheerleader, is putting finishing touches on the holiday cookies for the Vino Bash at Pinot’s (Noir that is)! She has an apron on over her turquoise and black Diane Von Furstenberg Naomi dress. She wanted to make sure everyone would be happy, so she baked ginger snap Christmas trees, shortbread dreidels, and she couldn’t figure out what to do for Kwanzaa so she made Africa-shaped chocolate cookies. Ah, sweet Riesling!

Pinot Noir is not even home yet. She’s still at Saks trying on shoes. All day has been about hair, makeup, nails and frock, and she has not been satisfied with any of it so far. She’s just hoping Cabernet Sauvignon makes an effort not to show up in his stupid team jersey and talk about football all night! But more importantly, as host of this glam slam, she has got to outshine all the other girls – especially Miss Tempranillo, the so-called Dreamgirl. OMG its so hard to be The Princess!

She gave the job of writing the invitation to Merlot, The Poet. Judging from all the silky lyrics he has been throwing at her since they met, she knew he was perfect for the task of presenting her holiday party as the can’t-miss-event –of-the-entire-season. And that he did, for the RSVPs came back in a deluge. He’s so smooth!

Its already 8:30PM and the party starts at 10:00PM. Syrah, The CEO shows up early as always, ready to pitch in and help pull things together. Riesling is relieved he’s here. He grabs her checklist and proceeds to move around Pinot’s large upper east side apartment making sure all I’s are dotted. Chardonnay arrived right on his heels. She wasn’t sure what time she should come and she didn’t want to be late. Plus she wanted to find a comfy spot on the couch so she could fade into the background. She pops into the kitchen to say hello to Riesling.

“Do I look OK?” asks shyly, in sensible flat shoes, wide leg khakis and an off-white cable knit cardigan.

Riesling washes her hands. She takes Chardonnay’s hair down out of the ever-present single ponytail, removes her glasses and hands them to her. “You look great!” she says and turns back to arranging trays of snacks and cookies.

Guests start arriving around 10:30PM. Pinot Gris is the DJ for the evening. He is selecting a great mix from his own collection with a little help from Spotify. His mohawk is freshly cut and he’s in black leather from head to toe with super pointy embellished wing tips. The house is rocking by 11:00PM. But where’s Pinot Noir?

At around 11:15PM, the door flies open. It’s Moscato, The Life of the Party, with a bottle in each hand yelling “Pop Pop!!” The party erupts in cheers and two of his friends carrying a cooler full of bubbly follow him through the crowded room to the coffee table. He jumps up on to the table, opens the two bottles, shakes them and sprays the crowed with sparkling wine. Syrah is appalled. Viognier, The Supermodel, slender and aloof in her yellow satin vintage couture cocktail frock, red leather L.A.M.B. clutch and black Manolo Blahnik heels suddenly comes alive and dives behind the bar in fright to avoid ruining her dress. She just knows it isn’t vintage champagne in the air!

Around 11:30PM sexy Miss Tempranillo arrives on the arm of Cabernet Franc, the Exchange Student. Merlot cuts his eyes at them with a jealous look. “That damned Franc gets all the girls! I bet it’s the accent,” he thinks to himself. She is every picture the dreamgirl, voluptuous in knee high heeled leather boots and a well fitted black calf length cap sleeved knit dress with shimmering silver trim, conservative on her bust line but deeply cut in the back to show off her tattoo, hair immaculatelycoiffed. Franc is in a slim fit double cuff royal blue Thomas Pink shirt with a red Prada blazer and white skinny jeans evoking Lupin the Third. Viognier peeks over the bar to see if its all clear. She spots the two of them and casually eyes Franc. She plots to catch him alone later for a chat, maybe when Temp goes to the bathroom.

Merlot turns his attention to Zinfandel, The Soul Singer, who had arrived about 20 minutes earlier. It would be his first time meeting her in person, even though they have a number of mutual friends. He’s seen her in some of their Facebook photos, but the pics don’t do her justice. She is gorgeous in an off-white silk dress and matching headdress that provide a flattering contrast to her dark cocoa skin tone. He stares at her full lips thinking “baby you can sing my poetry,” as he casually make his way across the room to baby grand piano where she’s standing chatting with Viognier and Syrah.

At around 11:45 Sauvignon Blanc arrives with Verdejo. Sauvignon decides to surprise everyone and show up in modern-day Bing Crosby Christmas special swag, complete with reindeer snowflake sweater and Santa hat. But the Santa hat is black and white and the reindeer on the sweater are trampling grandma. Verdejo sashays into the room, looking for the crudite platter so he can find the snack with the least calories so as to keep his perfect physique on point. His ruby velvet jacket layered over a gray scoop neck $50 Armani Exchange t-shirt is carefully accessorized with a powder blue pashmina scarf. He’s wearing his pewter pinky ring on the hand he always holds a wine glass with – his right one.

Finally, at 11:50PM, the door opens again, an there’s Cabernet Sauvignon looking dapper in a magenta suit and perfectly matched shirt (Versace for H&M) accented cleverly with a canary yellow bowtie and handkerchief. He’s so cocky! On his arm is his lady Pinot Noir, looking as perfect as she had hoped. She settled on the Christian Louboutin black feathered Carnival d’Orsay shoes and that Stella McCartney gold sequined cocktail dress that had just arrived at Bergdorf’s earlier this month. She is accessorized with tasteful black opal drop earrings and lots of black and gold bangles on her wrists. She is smiling and making the entrance she had planned with all her guests looking on. She starts to circulate the room with all the graces of a perfect host, while silently surveying the food and bar set up. She is satisfied with it all. She knew she could count on Riesling and Syrah to make sure her fete was tight! “I have arrived,” she thinks to herself, “the party may begin now.”

In all her earlier kvetching, Pinot didn’t even consider glamour competition from Gewürztraminer, who did indeed show up unexpectedly at exactly midnight. That Diva upstaged Pinot with a spectacular, show stopping entrance into her own party in a pair of Irregular Choice Best of All peacock feather platforms. She let her white rabbit fur coat slide casually off her shoulders to reveal a fabulous sleeveless fuchsia sequined cowl neck ankle length jumpsuit and an obscenely blingy diamond and sapphire necklace with matching earrings, cocktail ring and bracelet that looked like something from a Cartier window display. All eyes turn to take in her shine. Pinot nearly popped her cork!

By 12:30AM, the party was in full swing, and everyone was blending in happy holiday spirit. Here’s to a happy and safe season. Sip responsibly and get home safely!